Tuesday, April 19, 2011

How to get to grow up safe & form a balanced personality? The author identified three fundamental pillars: the affection, stability and constancy.!!!

Safety and responsibility
April 19, 2011, 6:25 pm

In a book of child psychiatry learned that an emotional issue for many children is the lack of self-confidence. And how to get to grow up safe and form a balanced personality? The author identified three fundamental pillars: the affection, stability and constancy. The child needs to feel loved by their parents and educators and agree with their virtues and weaknesses.

he environmental and regulatory framework must be stable. The rules of conduct in the family can not change overnight, as the mood of the father, or if you are tired or have things gone wrong at work. The rules must be agreed by both parents and can not be changed without a good reason. This is stability.

Those operating norms must be constant, i.e., for all days alike. The boy can guess what will happen tomorrow remembering what happened yesterday and the day before. With these three things a child will have a reference framework that will give you security.

But often are their own parents and educators who create insecurity in their children through" pedagogy wobbly." It will be formulated rules of conduct for today and tomorrow are no longer valid. A teacher said that "school is where more laws are given and where they are least fulfiled." Educators, who behave like that, provoke insecurity in the learner and, indirectly, they push to them to defy with a haughty behaviour, to their parents and teachers.

Children need loving parents, stable and consistent in its rules and decisions, that today reacting as they did yesterday and will do the same thing tomorrow and the day after. It needs to set limits with love for the sake of your child and insist on respect each other. Kids need strong parents who do not hesitate or falter, but they must know exactly what they want for themselves and their families. With such kind of educators, learners feel safe, welcome and happy.

Sometimes we remember the visit of a relative or friend with a child unfriendly, angry, tyrannical, used to always call the attention and failing to obey when called to order. In these situations, older people do not know whether imposed or compromise to avoid a scolding that leaves matters more uncomfortable to the parents than the child.

In conclusion, we could say that a boy that could not find around himself a signage and demarcation reasonable and reasoned it becomes unsafe or nervous.

Arturo Ramo
Independent Forum of Opinion

www island.lk

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Be kind to yourself, be proud of yourself, get comfortable being who you are because you will be ‘that’ a long time.!!!

- Lional Wijesiri

My Dear Son,

I suspect most people are never 100 percent happy with themselves and that is a good thing. A little self-criticism goes a long way. But in general be kind to yourself, be proud of yourself, get comfortable being who you are because you will be ‘that’ a long time. I think you are a great guy and tell you so often.

We spend so much of our time waiting to be loved, hoping love will find us, searching, yearning for that special love, feeling empty and lost without it, wanting someone to give us love and fill us up. Unfortunately, that’s not usually how life works. You will draw exactly what you create in life and what you believe you are worthy of. So loving yourself can create love in your life.

When you expect love from an external source and someone or something does not fulfil your void and fantasies, then you will feel worse than before.

The guy who is calm, cool, tidy, modest and strong is the one who has his internal act together. He knows who he is and he’s comfortable with it. He may work on making it better or even changing himself in some ways but only to advance, not because he doesn’t like what’s there now.

That wasn’t me for the first three decades of my life. I didn’t like who I was and I didn’t have control of my life. I’m still not wild about me but I’ve got used to me. My life is pretty good but it would have been so much better if I’d got it together twenty years sooner. Perhaps I can save you going the long way around.

Post this affirmation up someplace where you will see it each and every day; ‘I have the courage to believe that I am worthy of love.’ Read it out loud, every day, at least once.

Do three things a day, to change yourself into your dream person: if it is gaining or losing weight, then take a step by exercising or swimming for 20 minutes. If you want to ace your midterms, study harder.

If you need to become more organized and stop procrastinating then start cleaning and maintaining a place for every single item. Do what is on your to-do list by scheduling yourself.

Those are examples of three things to do in one day, to further a goal of someone becoming more fit, working towards a great career and gaining the mental clarity from the liberation of clutter! Achieving your goals, can make you love yourself much more because you are building a foundation for your own life and character

Learn to let go. There are a lot of people out there that have had hard lives or bad beginnings. It is important to let go of all the pain that is still inside you from that bad experience. This is often the hardest part of the journey, but once you’ve done it, you will really benefit from it.

Yours forever, Thaththi/FATHER